总是有些时候莫名其妙的不开心,心情不佳的时候就会办什么都不在状态,你会这样么?这里小编收集整理了简短英语笑话笑破你的肚子,让你的心情速速好起来。
AnimpoverishedgraduatestudentatClemsonUniversityinSouthCarolina,Iwasexcitedwhenmyfatherinformedmethathehadboughtmeacar.Hardlyabletocontainmyenthusiasm,IaskedDadthetypicalquestions:"Whatkindisit?Doesithaveastickshift?Doesithaveatapedeck?"
"It'sa1982Toyota,"hereplied."It'safourspeed,and,yes,ithasatapedeck."Pleased,Iaskedwhatcoloritwas.
"Well,"hesaiduncomfortably,"whichpart?"
Frequenthand-washinginmyjobasamedicaltechnologistandtheharshAlaskanweathercombinedtogivemeverydryskin.OnenightasIpreparedforbed,Irubbedmyhandswithpetroleumjellyandcoveredthemwithapairofoldwhitegloves.
AsIsatinbedreadingabookwithmygloveson,myhusbandfinishedshoweringandcameintotheroom.Dryinghimselfoff,hewenttothecloset,selectedatieandbeganputtingiton."Whatareyoudoing?"Iasked.
"Well,"hereplied,"ifyou'regoingtobeformal,soamI."
AsafreshmanattheUniversityofDaytoninOhio,Iwaseagertomakeagoodimpressiononmynewroommate.WhenIarrivedatourdormroom,Ifoundherputtingonperfume."That'sagreatscent,"Isaid,makingconversation.
"Thanks-itwasfrommyboyfriend.Here,trysome,"shesaid,holdingthebottleoutforme.
UnfortunatelysheletgobeforeIhadafirmgrip,andtheglassshatteredonthetilefloor.,Embarrassed,Itriedtoapologize,butshecutmeoff-"Actually,it'skindoffitting,"sheexplained,surveyingthedamage."That'sexactlyhowtherelationshipwent.
TeacherofPhysicalEducation:Haveyoueverseenmixeddoubles,boys?
Nick:Yes,sir.Quiteoften.Isawitevenlastnight.
Teacher:Pleasetellussomethingaboutit.
Nick:Oh,sorry,sir.Myfatheralwayssays,'Domesticshameshouldnotbepublished.'
混合双打
体育老师:孩子们,你们见过男女混合双打吗?
尼克:见过,老师,经常见。就在昨天夜里我还见过呢?
老师:你给大家讲讲当时的情形吧。
尼克:啊,对不起,老师。我爸爸常说,”家丑不可外扬。“